So if you haven’t yet heard, I’ve been skating with the Red Deer Roller Derby Association’s as freshmeat (derby’s name for total n00b).

Now if only I could montage my way up to boost my skating skills like in the movies, instead of having to grind them up like in WoW (non-referred) or RL.

Since I’ve started, I’ve hit a few practices, fallen more than a handful of of times, and sprained an ankle.

I still love it and I’m hoping to get better and faster on my skates. Sooner, preferably.

With all that said, I have to admit that being involved in derby has made me more sympathetic to power game-y listbuilders in 40K.

When I decided I want to get back to skating and learn the skills to get into derby, the first thing I did wasn’t go to my local roller rink, rent a pair of skates and skate around for a few weeks till I could do crossovers in my sleep.

Instead I went online. I bought a pair of Riedell 125s, instead of going for a more economical skate. I upgraded the wheels to Radar Diamonds, which were the most expensive option suggested to me given my frame. After a few sessions, I also made more purchases: (more) new wheels, nylon axle nuts because they were black and lighter than regular old metal nuts, new cushions and new stoppers.

I did all these things. I’m in about 600 bucks all in.  I still keep oogling  new skate plates. *

But let me be completely clear: I do not have the skills to even be looking at upgrading my skate plates. There’s really no reason I should even consider changing my wheel nuts (other than aesthetics) because  relieving my skates of 50 grams of weight isn’t going to at all improve my skating. I probably needed a narrower wheel, but the wheels I got are the ones most reliable sources recommend to advanced skaters, not freshmeat.

Meet power-gamer me. Instead of working on my skills, getting rink time and working at it, I’ve decided to try to compensate with more expensive gear.

I never got it before – what would compel guys who buy a netlist, go in about 600 bucks with a grey plastic army with mold lines and attend ‘ardboyz. I get it now.

We’re gamers first. That makes us good at a lot of things, including optimization. Shoring your odds, giving yourself the benefit of power units/expensive skate-setup will help compensate for a lack of skills.

Except, even with the nicest gear, even with the best build, if you don’t know how to use your Space Wolves, you may just get wrecked by the 30 Vespid Tau list.

I may have a sweet setup, but I still gotta learn how to stop on skates. And the guys with the leafblower guard should probably learn the mixed combat rules. You know, just in case.

*With all that said, the BEST investment was the $80.00 padded shorts. They are 100% FTW.  You know, cause I fall a ton. If only they made powergamer n00bs a set of ego-pads in the same vein – to help soften the blow of losses to better generals.